Monday, 26 January 2015

Feeling like a Red Balloon

Recently, I heard a joke about a red balloon and I thought it would be the perfect analogy to why I haven't blogged for 5 months. Like an old red balloon; I've felt let down, deflated a tad more wrinkled than I did last Summer. 

I've been very conscious that I didn't want to be/ or no longer be "social media martyr". I see competitive status' like "I've only had one/two/three hours sleep" or those who use their twitter feed to give us an hourly pain update, rated 1-10.  Worst of all, those who simply change their status to "I'm so happy/angry/sad" and when asked why, they refuse to answer - why put up a post that you're not willing to elaborate on to a SOCIAL MEDIA platform?

I fess up, I have done some of the above but after watching rather than posting online, I've seen how irritating and depressing it becomes for those reading. Don't get me wrong, we all need a moan or a venting session, it's nice to know there are others in the same situation or those giving you great advice, but do we need to post one the hour of every hour?

The last 8 years of my life have been dominated by 4 court cases (which by the way, I was not the criminal in any way, but I was the one mopping up the aftermath!) including family, criminal and Will & probate cases. It might have been easier to take a law degree! I've neglected my own goals, charity work and not to mention my family and friends. If I posted every time I was in pain, stressed, panicked I would have zero friends or followers!

All the events been exhausting and a few months back I decided to have hypnotherapy, it works very well on me from previous experience, and this time it really helped. So a long story short, the hypnotherapy worked and the cure was realising that I have forgotten to be optimistic, happy and grateful.

So how do you see the positive's in trauma? Well, I have gone back to seeing the bright side; what can I learn from all the cases? In my newly refreshed brain, I see that it has all been life experience; I will make sure I correctly file my Will and last testament, I will follow my instincts rather than fobbing off my opinions. I now know who my really friends are and I've learnt who only befriended me for their own gain and my useful resources - physical, mental or material. 

If nothing else, my memoirs will be an interesting read - split into several volumes!

Bear with me guys!

L xxx